artratcafe CAFE – Peas and Carrots…

artratcafe CAFE continues our veracious and verbose verbiage venerating the verisimilitude of the  vegetable this week with Peas and Carrots . Inspiration comes from Canadian poet, Lorna Crozier (see our Cucumber and Onion posts for details), Billimarie and Ogden Nash; and from beloved writer Beatrix Potter. A variety of art works complete this exploration into these versatile veggies. All due credits at the bottom of the page.







Peas Poem by Lorna Crozier
From:   Sex Lives of Vegetables.

Peas never liked any of it.
They make you suffer for the sweet
burst of green in the mouth. Remember
the hours of shelling on the front steps,
the ping in the basin? Your mother
bribing you with lemonade to keep you there,
popping them open with your thumbs.

Your tongue finds them clitoral
as it slides up the pod.
Peas are not amused.
They have spent all their lives
keeping their knees together.








So say we all – And, below, a memory of cafe food in my childhood England:








I eat my peas with honey; /  I’ve done it all my life. /  It makes them taste quite funny, /  But it keeps them on the knife.  Ogden Nash






Carrots by Lorna Crozier
From:   Sex Lives of Vegetables.

Carrots are fucking the earth. a

permanent erection, they push deeper

into the dark damp and dark.

all summer long

they try so hard to please

was it good for you,

was it good?

 Perhaps because the earth won’t answer

they keep on trying

while you stroll through the garden

think carrot cake,

carrots and onions in beef stew,

carrot pudding with caramel sauce,

they are fucking their brains out

in the hottest part of the afternoon.








Another Carrot poem by billimarie:








Remember your mother telling you that carrots were good for your eyes – dark nostalgia from WW2:








And finally an illustration from the ultimate cautionary tale from Beatrix Potter who’s hero, Peter Rabbit sneaks into the forbidden garden of  Mr. McGregor.  There, he gorges on carrots and vegetables until he gets sick.








And perhaps Peter Rabbit had a vision like this (below) after his mother fed him camomile tea –






Illustration Credits from top to bottom: 1. Peas and Carrots painting by Delilah / 2. Pea / 3. Peas on Earth posterGoogle Images. / 4. Mushy Peas posterGoogle Images. / 5. Carrot photo by Robert Thiel / 6. Painting by Rene / 7. Carrots Keep You Healthy…- / 8. Beatrix Potter. The Tale of Peter Rabbit. 1903 / 9. Carrots 1000 –

35 thoughts on “artratcafe CAFE – Peas and Carrots…

  1. John you are no mere varlet, or vagary of ideas, as you gather your vast and varied volume of vegetative variable of variants of vegetables . Showing vibrancy and variety of colour, my senses vibrate. The taste is better than vichyssoise , the words become visionary. So, in valediction I bid you a very good day.


    1. Gregory, your illiteration is veritably vernacular – who knew how much the ‘v’ in our language could be so versatile – I thank you for your verisimilitude…


  2. The Peas Poem makes me laugh and then I laughed again at the Fish Chips sign, half hoping and half dreading to find a recipe for Mushy Peas while scrolling down. Thanks for this delightful post. I’ll never look at a carrot the same.


    1. Glad you enjoyed it Nancy. There is no recipe for Mushy Peas, you just mush ’em. I always hated them anyway – fresh from the pod is more my style. As for carrots – well…


    1. Hello billimarie, an honour to meet you and thank you for the visits and follow. Your Carrot poem is brilliant and now I can drop by to see what else you have written. Look forward to getting to know you and your work – John


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